There is a time in our lives where we will stop trying. We give up because our body will stop fighting and become numb. The scary thought that we may lose everything all at once makes us stay awake at night. We have choices in this life and the ability to control our own actions. Why do you do it? A question disliked highly, unfortunately, will always be asked.
What makes us feel guilt?
The question i ask is, “What makes us feel so guilty after a heavy bout of drinking?” Shouldn’t we just be allowed to drink like everyone else? Make a complete idiot of ourselves and then get over it? Easy answer is, no, because we cant stop. The alcohol dependent individual will selfishly create an existence with just them as the centre of the universe. Here, everybody else is inferior and mere inconveniences.
Early drinking Period
This period of drinking is the first stage. We have had 2 or 3 drinks and feel like we are in control. We could possibly stop before things get out of hand. This is the last attempt that your brain will try and send signals. Our left side will try to reason but is sadly put to sleep. A bit out of the box, but it is how I picture things going on in my head.
The Next thing we know it is Daylight. We are in need of water, and the toilet never seemed further away. This day is the most important in our battle. It is the day that we can either drink gallons of water, take a pill, and call our sponsor. Or we can vomit, drink a glass of water, put our shoes and coat on and head to the off-licence.
Are we alone?
Not all of us are blessed with having the support of family and friends. These people will have the hardest fight on this day. The switch will not have an off button with these few, and the only way through another hour is intoxication. The loneliness will be too much. Having a little bit of encouragement can be life changing sometimes.
There must be something, one small thing in this persons life that will give them the will to be sober. I will never pin point the fail of sobriety to will power, as this is not the case.
What is the theory of will power?
“Psychological researchers have a name for this phenomenon: ego depletion. The theory is that willpower is connected to a limited reserve of mental energy, and once we run out of that energy, we’re more likely to lose self-control.”
Wow! that is a really interesting theory. Have our ego’s been depleted? Have we experianced past events in our lives that have used up our mental energy?
With the trauma that some of us will experience in our lives, this could be true.
I don’t want to go into this at the moment, but it certainly deserves it’s own post.
I have wrote a short piece about my story please have a read.My Story.